Somewhere In The Middle – Casting Crowns
Somewhere between the hot and the cold
Somewhere between the new and the old
Somewhere between who I am and who I used to be
Somewhere in the middle, You'll find me
Somewhere between the wrong and the right
Somewhere between the darkness and the light
Somewhere between who I was and who You're making me
Somewhere in the middle, You'll find me
Just how close can I get, Lord, to my surrender without losing all control
Fearless warriors in a picket fence, reckless abandon wrapped in common sense
Deep water faith in the shallow end and we are caught in the middle
With eyes wide open to the differences, the God we want and the God who is
But will we trade our dreams for His or are we caught in the middle
Are we caught in the middle
Somewhere between my heart and my hands
Somewhere between my faith and my plans
Somewhere between the safety of the boat and the crashing waves
Somewhere between a whisper and a roar
Somewhere between the altar and the door
Somewhere between contented peace and always wanting more
Somewhere in the middle You'll find me
Just how close can I get, Lord, to my surrender without losing all control
Fearless warriors in a picket fence, reckless abandon wrapped in common sense
Deep water faith in the shallow end and we are caught in the middle
With eyes wide open to the differences, the God we want and the God who is
But will we trade our dreams for His or are we caught in the middle
To me it seems there is no worse place to be than stuck in the middle. In a state of limbo. A state of indecision. As the song says, you are neither hot nor cold, nor new or old, etc.
There are some decisions in life that are easy to make. And others are next to impossible. It seems sometimes that you will lose no matter what decision you make but need to trust that you have made the best one. To have faith that you have made the right one.
As much as we are supposed to pray for everything both good and bad, so often we end up just calling out to God during our times of need - at times when we need to make decisions. We are supposed to cast all our cares and worries on Him, but also to praise Him in thanksgiving for all the good in our lives as well.
There comes a time in our lives when we will all be stuck in the middle. Have a lukewarm faith. I’m there now. I long for that fire. That closeness. That passion. But it seems so many things keep stepping in my way. I think it comes down to the one line of the song “Just how close can I get, Lord, to my surrender without losing all control.” I’m a control freak. I’ll admit it. I like order. I like to know what is going on at all times. I like to plan everything around me. Surrendering control seems completely impossible for me. But I have taken the first step.
On Good Friday I walked up the aisle to the cross and I nailed something to it, then took communion. I surrendered something from my life over to God. I decided at that moment I could no longer carry that burden. I surrendered it to God. I have been wanting to do it and mentally already had, but being physically able to “nail it to the cross” lifted a huge weight from my shoulders and from my heart. I immediately felt a sense of freedom. I felt God’s love flow over my body and fill my heart. For one moment, I finally didn’t feel like I was just “lukewarm”. I felt a fire inside – a warmth – a sense of peace. This was a feeling I wouldn’t trade for the world.
I want to live a life I can be proud of. I want to be strong and fearless. I want to set an example for my children. I want them to look at me one day and say “I’m so glad you are my mom”. I want to know that I’ve been a positive influence on peoples lives around me. I want to be a fearless warrior. I want to live the life He has planned for me. I want to have faith that can move mountains. I want to love like nothing else. I want to give all I am and all I have to make life better for others.
But first I need to learn to surrender, or else I’ll always be stuck in the middle. I don’t want to be in the middle. I want to be high on that mountain, rejoicing in the clouds, not just found somewhere in the middle.
Friday, April 17, 2009
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Open Doors
There are many different quotes about how if you close one door another door will open. I came across this other quote that I like better: “Sometimes we stare so long at a door that is closing that we see too late one that is open.” – Alexander Graham Bell.
How incredibly true. So often we are blinded and preoccupied with the fact that we are closing a door, or it is closing on us, that we don’t see what opportunities are before us. That sometimes the closing of a door is opening to something wonderful. It’s all in the perspective you want to have. Do you see things positively or negatively? Is the hourglass running out of time or do you think…”ok, there are still a few more grains of sand left…what will I do with that time”?
But the bigger question is, is the door actually closing? Sometimes a door closing really is a door opening. A door opening to possibilities. Opening to adventure. Opening to experiences one would never have if the door didn’t “close”.
Take for example a relationship ending. Whether it be a relationship ending mutually or not, a door is closing. Something that was a constant in your life is no longer there. A door has closed. Or has it really? It’s all in how you look at it.
One could see it as a negative thing. That a door has closed and I can never go back to the way things were and my life will never be the same. That is true. Life never will be the same. That person has left a huge impact and “footprint” on your life. That will never go away.
But in the same situation, look at it with a positive spin. Yes the relationship has ended and a door has closed, but is there a possibility for a different type of relationship? Do I have wonderful memories to reflect on? Can I see this as a door opening instead of one closing? In every situation there is an opportunity. An opportunity to grow. To become a better person. To experience life fuller and deeper each day.
The same thing goes for job situations. If someone loses their job, a door has closed. But equally, a lot of other doors have opened as well. Perhaps it’s a chance to change a career completely. Maybe it’s a chance to go back to school. What was gained from the previous job? Experiences to bring forward to a new job. Incredible references for any future employment opportunities.
It is so easy to get caught up with the fact that a door is closing. It is far too easy to just curl up sitting next to the door, holding your knees, rocking back and forth. Or even standing at the door, banging on it with both fists, even kicking it, hoping to break it down so that it would be open again. But does this solve anything.
Even if the door reopened, it technically isn’t reopening. It is another door opening completely – one of those doors that wasn’t seen while your entire focus was on the first door closing. You can’t go back in time. Nothing can be the same as it was. But you can walk through that new door, learn from the past and enjoy each and every second beyond that next door.
How incredibly true. So often we are blinded and preoccupied with the fact that we are closing a door, or it is closing on us, that we don’t see what opportunities are before us. That sometimes the closing of a door is opening to something wonderful. It’s all in the perspective you want to have. Do you see things positively or negatively? Is the hourglass running out of time or do you think…”ok, there are still a few more grains of sand left…what will I do with that time”?
But the bigger question is, is the door actually closing? Sometimes a door closing really is a door opening. A door opening to possibilities. Opening to adventure. Opening to experiences one would never have if the door didn’t “close”.
Take for example a relationship ending. Whether it be a relationship ending mutually or not, a door is closing. Something that was a constant in your life is no longer there. A door has closed. Or has it really? It’s all in how you look at it.
One could see it as a negative thing. That a door has closed and I can never go back to the way things were and my life will never be the same. That is true. Life never will be the same. That person has left a huge impact and “footprint” on your life. That will never go away.
But in the same situation, look at it with a positive spin. Yes the relationship has ended and a door has closed, but is there a possibility for a different type of relationship? Do I have wonderful memories to reflect on? Can I see this as a door opening instead of one closing? In every situation there is an opportunity. An opportunity to grow. To become a better person. To experience life fuller and deeper each day.
The same thing goes for job situations. If someone loses their job, a door has closed. But equally, a lot of other doors have opened as well. Perhaps it’s a chance to change a career completely. Maybe it’s a chance to go back to school. What was gained from the previous job? Experiences to bring forward to a new job. Incredible references for any future employment opportunities.
It is so easy to get caught up with the fact that a door is closing. It is far too easy to just curl up sitting next to the door, holding your knees, rocking back and forth. Or even standing at the door, banging on it with both fists, even kicking it, hoping to break it down so that it would be open again. But does this solve anything.
Even if the door reopened, it technically isn’t reopening. It is another door opening completely – one of those doors that wasn’t seen while your entire focus was on the first door closing. You can’t go back in time. Nothing can be the same as it was. But you can walk through that new door, learn from the past and enjoy each and every second beyond that next door.
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